This is a scheduled post using the prompt NOMINATION for inspiration.
(I’m just trying to stay ahead of the game and have a Saturday lie-in).
For those with the time or inclination, feel free to join in the fun!
“Which one?” Jerome looked up as Elsie dropped a ring binder on his desk.
“Which one what?” She took the chair opposite him.
“You know what I’m talking about.” He pointed his pen at her. “Don’t make me say it out loud.”
“Not this elaborate crap again?” She folded her arms across her chest. “I’ve made my choice.”
“It’s not as simple as that,” he reminded her. “You can’t just eliminate people on a whim.”
“If you say so.”
“I do.” Jerome opened the folder. “I know I’m a little fussy, but we need a robust paperwork trail. Let’s begin.” He cleared his throat. “In your opinion, who is the most annoying nominee and or candidate?”
“You answered without any hesitation.” He made a note in the file. “I hope you put plenty of thought into this?”
“Fair enough. Of your selectees, which one would you hate to be stuck in a lift with?”
“Not looking good for Two!” Jerome chuckled. “Two strikes against him or her so far.”
“I told you this was a waste of time. Why prolong the agony?”
“If we don’t adhere to procedure, head office will send someone down to ask awkward questions and generally interfere. We don’t want that, do we?”
“Do I take that as a yes?”
“If it makes you happy, Jerome.”
“Your attitude leaves a lot to be desired. This will have to go in my report.”
“Can we just get on with this?”
“Relying on your extensive research, who is the one most likely not to be invited to a friend’s wedding, or party, etc?”
“The evidence is building up here.” Jerome nodded. “This is not something I make a habit of, but considering your answers, I will let you sign the form now. I’ll complete it later.”
“No, let’s carry on,” said Elsie. “A full house would cement my decision in stone.”
“Just like the corpse of number Two. Okay, I can tell by your face you didn’t find that funny, which brings us to the next question. Which target would you describe as a humourless bastard? Oh, don’t bother answering: it’s two, isn’t it?”
Elsie nodded, and Jerome slumped in defeat.
“Is there any point in reading the last question?”
“We should see this through.” She leaned across and plucked the folder from his hands. “And regarding the next question, am I certain two is the one most likely—”
“—to finish someone’s sentence. Sounds a bit of a tosser, but at least you know which one to take down first.”
“I’ve always known,” Elsie grinned.
“Then sign and date where indicated, and get out of my office.”
“My office now,” said Elsie. She whipped out her gun and put a bullet between his eyes.