Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Colour Blind

LindaGHill hosts Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
The prompt this week is color/colour.
Use it as a noun, a verb, or pick a colour and write about it.
The post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing
(typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
Click HERE for the rest of the rules, and to play along.


What do you see?
Do you see black or white?
Do you see pink or grey?
Do you see yellow or brown?
Or are you colour blind?
And you see only people?

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Who’s a silly Canute, then?

LindaGHill hosts Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
The prompt this week is least-favourite word. Enjoy!
The post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing
(typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
Click HERE for the rest of the rules, and to play along.


Warning: Article contains adult themes and numerous references to front bottoms.

Yes, we’re delving into country matters today with a word I truly loathe.

Before I rant on, let’s have a moment of confession: I have been known to use this word, but not in a sweary-cussing way. Think bedroom, and I’ll leave the rest to your overactive imagination.

However, it never spews forth from my mouth as a curse. I frown and tut at anyone who uses a word for my lady-bits as an insult. (The feminism is strong with this one!). But honestly, how did a simple four-letter word (etymology still debated and caution advised before clicking on the link) become the most offensive one in the English language?

Ever tried sending an email with Scunthorpe in the subject bar? Believe me, it will be blocked. Same thing happens if you spell Weight Watchers™ as one word. Daft thing, as slurs go, the one lurking in Weight Watchers ™ doesn’t rile me as much as the one in Scunthorpe.

This is completely irrational, because offence is taken not given, and it’s my problem if I get my knickers in a knot over it – freedom of speech and all that. But can we not reclaim this word and put it up there with fanny, pussy, minge, and muff? These make me laugh, along with lady-garden, frou-frou and quim.

I should mention at this point that I am a potty-mouthed little scamp. When in full flow, I can make a docker blush. But I cannot abide that particular combination of letters. Am I the only one with this hang-up? Dr Freud would have his work cut out analysing this neurosis.

And one last thing before I go: how do men feel when euphemisms for their most intimate parts are used as insults?

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Hope

LindaGHill hosts Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
The prompt this week is hope. Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!
The post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing
(typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
Click HERE for the rest of the rules, and to play along.


I hope…

…I am finally free from the shadow cast by the most selfish person I ever had the displeasure to meet. “I’ll be with Jerry for life,” she once told me whilst at the same time making goo-goo eyes at my husband. And he, like a blind dick, fell for it.

…she is happy now she’s left her precious husband and moved in with someone else’s man.

…both Jerry and the new boyfriend’s soon-to-be ex-wife recover from their broken hearts.

…I can find it in my heart to forgive her for messing with my husband’s head and making my life a misery for the last year.

…she one day realises the extent of her betrayal: so much for friendship and integrity.

…the hatred I feel towards her disappears. But it was either hate the other woman or hate him, my husband, the father of our children and my best friend.

…he will never make that mistake again.

…he never finds out I knew all about it

…he realises we still have a future because he doesn’t know it, but I forgave him long ago.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Light-Fingered

LindaGHill hosts Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
The prompt this week is “contains igh.’ Find a word that contains the letters “igh” in that order and use it in your post. Enjoy!
The post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing
(typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
Click HERE for the rest of the rules, and to play along.


When she was eight, Melanie stole two sweets (worth two pence each) from her local newsagent. She knew better than to take what wasn’t hers. But the previous week, the shop assistant short-changed her by four pennies.

This sleight of hand outraged her friend Sam, but Melanie was too shy to go back in and point out the mistake. And what would be the point of asking a thief to give her back the money?

Melanie and Sam concocted a plan; if she took the amount owed in goods, then everything would be alright. Luckily for Melanie, it was the depths of winter, and she could wear a hand-me-down coat from an older cousin. A girl with absolutely no taste in clothing. The thing was in purple plaid, with purple fur trim on the hood and sleeves. Melanie looked a fright in it, but the coat came with a fur-lined muff: the perfect shoplifting accessory.

While Sam pretended to dither over BlackJacks versus Fruit Salads, Melanie arranged herself at the counter and leaned forward as though fascinated. The same woman was serving, and Melanie took great delight in lifting those two sweets. But only the two and only four pence worth. When Sam finally made up her mind, she paid for her goodies. They slowly left the shop and then took flight, running to the park.

They sat on a bench, and Melanie offered Sam a sweet. But she shook her head and said she wanted to go home. Her eyes were filmy with tears. Melanie’s belief that this theft was justified crumbled. She could hear her mother’s voice: Two wrongs don’t make a right.

She didn’t sleep well that night. The sweets seemed to burn a hole through the mattress where she’d hidden them. And she cried at the thought that she’d blighted her friendship with Sam.

After school the next day, she put on her voluminous coat and dragged Sam back to the shop. Melanie walked up to the till and handed over the two sweets.

“Sorry, I took these without paying for them.”

“Really?” said the woman at the till. “Well, I’m glad you came back and told me because we don’t tolerate thieves here.”

Melanie blushed and handed over the money.

The woman gave her a curt nod and turned to the next customer.

Outside the shop, Sam smiled and said. “Thank you.”

They linked arms and the great weight crushing Melanie slipped away. She laughed with relief, and they skipped along the road, stopping only to throw the sweets into a bin.

And Melanie never stole again.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Weave a Word

LindaGHill hosts Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
The prompt this week is YARN.
Use the word any way you’d like and have fun!
The post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing
(typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
Click HERE for the rest of the rules, and to play along.


Yarn rhymes with darn
But not with warn
This rhymes with corn

The Yanks like to pull a plow
When the weather will allow
Limeys also use a plough
But not when they have a cough

Which rhymes with trough
But not with tough
I’ve had enough…

Image from sewwhatalicia.com