Tag Archives: Lies

Fibbing Friday 26th November 2021 – You’ve Been Rick Rolled!

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Frank (PCGuy) and Di (Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday. To join in, write a post with your answers to the 10 questions below and tag it #FibbingFriday. Then link back to Fibbing Friday so others can enjoy the answers and join in too!

1.  What is rolling stock
A cow on wheels.

2.  What is a rolling deck
The moment you realise those anti-seasickness tablets aren’t working.

3.  What is role play
Sexual shenanigans with baked dough products.

4.  What is ‘on a roll’
When you find Rick Astley all over the internet.

5.  What does a rolling stone gather?
Numerous ex-wives.

6.  What is a rolling boil
A sure sign of bubonic plague!

7.  What is a rolling pin
A wee scalpel for lancing those nasty plague buboes.

8.  What is a steam roller
A Scottish dumpling made from suet and Irn-Bru.

9.  What is a roller coaster
A surfer who only plonks about with a surfboard in shallow waters.

10. What is a roller skate
A fish on a bicycle.

Fibbing Friday 19th November 2021 – Crazy Golf

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Frank (PCGuy) and Di (Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday. To join in, write a post with your answers to the 10 questions below and tag it #FibbingFriday. Then link back to Fibbing Friday so others can enjoy the answers and join in too!

What is an Arnold Palmer?
A man’s name, and that’s Ms Palmer to you.

What is a niblick?
A very small snack.

What is a mashie?
A sand sprite who haunts the bunkers.

What’s the difference between a hook and a slice?
About 150 calories per portion.

What name is given to a single hole score of three under par?
A Huey, Dewey or a Lewie.

What’s a bogey?
A caddie with a bad cold.

What’s the difference between a regular golf course and an executive golf course?
Only executive players are allowed to wear Argyll Sweaters.

What unique award is given to the winner of the Masters Tournament?
A wedgie.

Why do golf balls have dimples?
So you can tell them apart from ping-pong balls.

What is the 19th hole?
The place where old golfers go to die.

Fibbing Friday 12th November 2021 – Lucky Dip

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Frank (PCGuy) and Di (Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday. To join in, write a post with your answers to the 10 questions below and tag it #FibbingFriday. Then link back to Fibbing Friday so others can enjoy the answers and join in too!

1.   Lucky dip is self-explanatory when it comes to gifts, but how did it originate?
The original barrel was full of piranha fish, and a lucky dip was when you pulled out a gift with your hand still attached.

2.   Why is seven considered a lucky number?
Ask Snow White.

3.   Why is thirteen considered unlucky?
Because this is the age your sweet-natured child morphs into a grumpy goth who writes bad poetry and can only mumble incoherently: life’s not fair!

4.   Why do they say elephants never forget?
Due to the huge capacity of the ROM and RAM chips in their tusks.

5.   How did slippers get so-called?
Because they were a troupe of family-friendly strippers who stopped when they got to their petticoats.

6.   What are the doldrums?
A nihilistic rock band. Your teenaged children probably love them.

7.   Do igloos have central heating?
Yes, but like the Romans, the Inuit people prefer underfloor heating. Have you ever tried attaching a radiator to a curved wall?

8.   What was a jamboree bag?
A body bag for dead boy scouts.

9.   What were blackjacks?
Best not mentioned. Thankfully they went the way of the Black and White Minstrel show.

10. Little Boy Blue blew what exactly?
His inheritance on strong fencing to keep the cows out of the corn.

Fibbing Friday 29th October 2021 – Samhain Chanted Evening

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Frank (PCGuy) and Di (Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday. To join in, write a post with your answers to the 10 questions below and tag it #FibbingFriday. Then link back to Fibbing Friday so others can enjoy the answers and join in too!

Why does garlic repel vampires?
Because they would never be so uncool as to have stinky breath.

What do you need to kill a werewolf?
The Collected Works of Lawrence Welk: they’ll curl up and die after the third or fourth song.

What is the purpose of a Jack-o-lantern?
To light the way to the 9th circle of hell.

What exactly is a ghoul?
One of a pair of goolies.

Why can’t vampires enter a home unless invited?
They’re like bailiffs and need a court order to gain access.

Why can’t vampires cross running water?
They can, but only on a pedalo.

What does a chupacabra eat?
No gluten or dairy products, but peanuts are OK.

What is the name of the three-headed dog that guards the gates of the underworld?
Franklin D. Roosevelt, Winston Churchill, and Joseph Stalin.

Who are the Stygian Witches?
A death-metal band from Bavaria: they really know how to rock the accordion!

What alcoholic beverage is thought to be the true origin of witches’ brew?
Malibu and coke.

Fibbing Friday 22nd October 2021 – Collective Consciousness

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Frank (PCGuy) and Di (Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday. To join in, write a post with your answers to the 10 questions below and tag it #FibbingFriday. Then link back to Fibbing Friday so others can enjoy the answers and join in too!

1. A walk of …………camels

2. A bed of …………. eels

3. A horde of ………….mammoths

4. A bike of …………..sardines

5. A rhumba of ………..ruminants

6. A shrewdness of ………….ferrets

7. A raft of ……………..skunks

8. A mess of …………….crabs

9. A huddle of ……………moose

10. A family of……………….frogs