With the help of Frank (PCGuy), Di (Pensitivity101) and Melanie (Sparks From a Combustible Mind), I’ve been telling some walloping lies. Here are some of my whoppers from over the years.
What is tic, tac, toe?
Terminal athlete’s foot.
What is noodling?
Something your mother warned you about. It WILL make you go blind.
What is meant by pigeon-toed?
It is an illegal move in karate when you confuse your opponent by flapping your arms up and down, then floor him with a well-aimed kick to the head.
Why is saying bless you when someone sneezes considered to be good luck?
Because, with correct enunciation, perfect diction and good aim, you can spit your germs into their face.
Who sang I wanna hold your hand?
What can be known as a ‘Little Gem’?
This is what happens to a gentleman’s “family jewels” when he doesn’t wear warm underwear and stays out in the cold for too long.
What is a sphincter
An unmarried sphinx
What is a xertz?
The noise made when passing a painful stool.
What is a sickly hue?
The ability to produce projectile vomit on demand.
If today is your birthday, what star sign are you?
Saggyhairyass: 1st April to the 12th of Never.
Character: Uptight but unhinged on a full moon.
Motto: fools rush in where horses must be led.
Lucky vegetable: cabbage.